Gifts and Presence

Written by Sharon Hoover

Well, here it is again – the last day of the year. It’s the time when we reflect on the recent past. I find that what floats seemingly unbidden into my awareness are those things that disappoint – or worse. I’m disappointed that I didn’t complete John’s afghan – the one I’ve been knitting for THREE years! I’m embarrassed that I didn’t lose those 10, well 15, pounds and that roll of fat around my middle. I’m ashamed of the judgments I’ve held against some of my dearest and most precious friends – you know who you are and I’m sorry.

Of course, I did many things for which I’m grateful, proud, and humbled, but I work myself over with the other stuff and there are gifts for me there. In my case, it’s almost always about how I was being with someone else. My choice, then, is how I want to be with myself in the face of that reality.

I can beat myself up. I do that more than I want to admit – and then I beat myself up for beating myself up.

I can justify my behavior. I’m often impressed by how elegantly convincing are my excuses, provided that’s, and limits from ‘out there.’

I can give up on myself, convinced that any attempts to ‘improve’ are futile because life is hopeless and I’m worthless.

I can get into pure desire then buck up with yet another list of New Year’s Resolutions.

Or I can say “thank you’ for EVERYthing in my life in the year gone by. I can search for and find ALL that was true. I can take myself back to those most vivid experiences and find everything that was part of that reality. I can discover MY part in each event, those I liked as well as those that just shouldn’t have happened. THAT’s the part that I can affect. I just can’t make Life, or my friends, my government, my spouse, those people who try to sell me stuff . . . do what I want. I have precious little to do with most of what happens to me. I have a LOT to do about what I do and how I’m being.

And then I choose. No matter which way I go, it is my choice. Just notice and choose. Notice and choose. It’s that simple though it isn’t easy to choose the more challenging path of taking responsibility for your experience. Practicing mastery is NOT the easy path, though in so many ways, it’s really the simplest.

Blessings to you for all you did and all you were in 2009 no matter what.

Sharon

Courage to go beyond fears

Look and you will find it --- what is unsought will go undetected
Sophocles

The Art of Mastery is about discerning what you want in your heart of hearts.
Giving voice to what you fear;
Seeking the truth underneath the fear and
Giving vision to what you truly want to create in your life.

As you look back on 2009, what did you want that you didn't create?
Is it something you want to go for again?
How will you be different this time?

As you look forward to 2010, what ONE thing do you want to create for your self, for others, and for the transformation of our world?

See it, name it, seek it....it's there for you to have.

Follow your LifeShocks for They will guide you on your journey.

The Practice of Processing Mastery class is on offer to you as you envision and plan your creation in 2010.

The Practice of Mastery . . .

"Being radically response-able for the quality of your results, relationships and self-regard as you engage with the challenges of your life"

Adapted from the Art of Responsibility

Explore your practice of Response-ability.

How are you navigating the results you want ~

Are you consciously choosing and course correcting or
are you on automatic pilot?

Are you intentionally connecting in your relationships or
are you covertly separating?

Are you expanding your love-ability and joy or
are you contracting into numbness?

Think about it! Act on it!
It may be that simple ~ notice, tell the truth, choose, create, experience gratitude ~ The response is up to you.

“A lot of things
make a difference.
Some things make
all the difference." K.Bradford Brown, Guidelines to Creativity

Did you make some new commitments for 2009? Or are you like my friend who is so tired of struggling to change her behavior that she decided to spare herself all that this year.

Most of us know what that’s like, don’t we? I made myself miserable for weeks struggling to stick to a food plan a few years ago. Give up sugar? Please! No caffeine? Sorry, I meet with clients at coffee shops, for heaven’s sake. And what about all the food at networking functions and family gatherings? It seemed hard wherever I turned.

In spite of the battle I’d had with it before, last year I committed to the same plan again. This time, though, I sailed through it with a sense of fun and creative challenge. It was easy!

What made the difference? I was 100% committed. All the way in.

I’ll bet you have experience with being 100% in, too. Once we’re all in we start looking for how to stay with it, how to make it work, what supports the goal. Quite simply, our purpose acts as a filter for where to put our attention. As long as we’re holding out at some level, we pay attention to other options, too, so there are more decision points, more temptation, and more struggle.

Practice: Where is your commitment in the 90’s (or less) rather than at 100%? What would it take for you to put the full focus of your commitment behind it? Find your 100% and see what happens!